Ah love. That special feeling of warm and fuzzies that spread from your heart to your belly and ends in your downstairs region. These feelings are strongest when you think of that one extraordinary person who makes your life worth living. For some people it’s their boyfriend or girlfriend. For others it’s their secret crush. If you’re me, it’s the pizza delivery guy.
Since next week is the The Big Day for lovers everywhere, single people everywhere tend to bitch and moan about how awful things are going for them. Need I remind you how amazing it is to be single? You don’t have to shave your legs, report your every move to someone, or share your twin sized bed with anyone but your laptop.
I’ve compiled a list of fantastic ideas of things to do if you’re flying solo next Friday. Feel free to use them and report back how much fun you had.
1) Celebrate Galentine’s Day. Any fan of Parks and Recreation knows about Leslie Knope’s day for lady friends to celebrate their lady friendships. Technically, this is most holy of days is supposed to happen Feb. 13, but why not push it to Friday. Better yet, make it a two day event.
2) Treat. Yo. Self.
3) Watch Parks and Recreation so you understand what I’m saying to you.
4) Rent a scary movie. Or any movie that isn’t going to make you cry because no one loves you.
5) Make a Tinder and see what kind of crazy people are out there. You’ll instantly feel better about being alone.
6) Make a Tinder and get matches with normal people and your self esteem will go way, way up. Trust me.
7) Order Dominos online with special instructions. Make the guy tell you a joke. Or give you a hug. Whatever you need.
8) Go to the bar.
9) Wake up Feb. 15 and go to any store. All the candy is now half priced. And really what’s better than that? Oh right, nothing.
10) Go see the Lego movie (if you go, take me with you. None of my friends will go with me. Unless they’re saving it for Galentines, which I highly doubt).
11) Make a whole cake and eat it all by yourself. You don’t have to share with someone. No one is going to judge you. And who cares if you get icing all over your face? No one is going to see it.
12) Volunteer at the Humane Society. Playing with puppies and kittens is scientifically proven to make you feel better according to a fact I think I read one time.
13) Go eat dinner at Boozel. Nothing will make you feel less like being in love than the overwhelming feeling you’re about to have explosive diarrhea.
14) Go out to dinner with friends and make up things couples are saying. Or watch Date Night and let Tina Fey and Steve Carell do all the work for you.
15) Do that Pinterest project you’ve been putting on the back burner. Unless Pinterest isn’t a thing anymore. I can’t keep up with these things.
Regardless of what you do, don’t feel bad about being single. There’s no rule that says you have to be in a relationship just because it’s mid-February. Or anytime for that matter. You have your whole life to get cards with pink hearts and some awful poem about how beautiful you are.
Besides, do you really want someone doing nice things with you just because it’s Valentine’s day? I didn’t think so. Enjoy your day!