If you’re like most couples, you probably fight from time to time. It’s perfectly normal to have disagreements with your partner; after all, you’re two different people! However, consistent fighting can damage your relationship and impact other areas of your busy life as well. Healthy relationships require trust, communication, and respect, and if you’re constantly arguing with your partner, those things become challenging to maintain. Read on to discover what to do if you’re frequently fighting with your partner.
Don’t Take Things Too Personally
It’s normal to get frustrated when your partner gets angry at you. It can be tempting to take things personally and feel hurt by the other person’s words when this happens.
While it doesn’t make your partner’s actions fair, college is stressful for us all. Sometimes, a bad lecture or frustrating home situation can lead our partners to put their grueling day on our shoulders. One of the first steps in addressing a problematic relationship is to not let your emotions get the best of you and instead focus on solving the problem at hand when possible.
Talk to Your Partner
A lot of the time, fights happen because we’re not communicating effectively with our partners. We might be harboring resentment or anger that we don’t express openly or failing to recognize where our own frustrations come from. If you want to tackle arguments before they start, talk with your partner about what’s bothering you when you notice it.
Make Time for Each Other
When couples are busy and stressed out, whether over finals prep or packing the dorm, they often forget how important it is to make time for each other. Try setting aside some quality time together when neither of you has any obligations or responsibilities beyond spending time with each other. Even infrequent efforts to share a coffee, enjoy a walk, or vent about classes can help reestablish the connection you share and hopefully prevent future fights.
Take a Break
One of the most important things to do if you’re fighting with your partner is to take a break. Step away from the situation so that you can both calm down and approach the problem with a fresh perspective. A simple walk or time in different rooms allows you to consider your position more thoroughly and find ways you want to move forward.
Seek Professional Help
If you’re still struggling to get along with your partner, you can always seek outside help. A therapist can provide committed couples with tools and strategies for communicating effectively and healthily resolving conflicts. Working with a professional when you’re both motivated to make an effort can help you unlearn toxic behavior and discover new ways to support those you love.
Keep in mind that if you’re both uncomfortable with your current therapist, you can always seek another. You have many resources available to help you maintain your relationship, from counselors to friends and family, and even the advice of school mentors.