Music lyrics misleading for young women

Many of us, as young teenagers, listened to the pop music of the late 90's and early 2000's, as these artists and songs were what helped shape our perceptions of who we should be and how we ought to act. Many of us young girls remember blaring the latest songs from our radio, sang by the trendiest groups such as the Backstreet Boys, ‘N Sync, Destiny's Child and Britney Spears. As a young teenager, I took the lyrics of these groups to be the truth on every matter and nothing but, because I idolized them. Looking back, I have begun to grasp that these same lyrics I belted out with a hairbrush microphone are some of the same lyrics that I have grown to be offended by as a woman, and more importantly as a feminist.

After listening to many of these songs from my past, I now understand why many women of my generation have no idea how to be in a successful and healthy relationship. While growing up hearing inconsistent messages about a woman's value and a woman's part in a relationship, it has become apparent that the music industry and our idolized pop stars have an immense responsibility for many of our failures in the world of dating.

Recently, while listening to a popular song from my teenage years, "Cater 2 U" by Destiny's Child, I began to realize how many contradicting messages women and girls receive about their worth and role in the world. The song "Cater 2 U," I will admit, has graced my iPod undetected by my feminist self for years, but upon finally hearing it again, I heard it for its true message.

Within the first few lines, the statement is made that without a man, a woman's life is purposeless. It's not appropriate to communicate to young women and girls that their life is purposeless without a man in it. Throughout this song, there are descriptions of the things this woman is doing to cater to her man, but never once is there anything communicated about having a relationship that is 50/50. I agree that women should do nice things for their significant others and appreciate them, but making every one of that person's wishes come true without the acts being reciprocated, just means you're letting that person walk all over and take advantage of you (i.e. you're a doormat).

Also mentioned in this song is the fact that if you're not a doormat and willing to cater to your man's every wish and need ever, then it is perfectly acceptable for him to find some other woman who is willing to do so. And in another song, "Girl," again by Destiny's Child, the woman being cheated on blames herself for her man not being faithful to her. In the video, this woman has dinner on the table waiting for him all night (clearly doing something nice for her man) and he is out with another woman. If a man is cheating on a perfectly great woman, it is NOT her fault, end of story.

I remember the days when Destiny's Child's message was to be an independent woman, especially when they came out with their song "Independent Woman Pt.1." This song describes that woman should be, "always 50/50 in relationships." This I agree with immensely. While I don't think that women should cater to every man's wish and need, I also don't think that women should sit on their butt and expect to be taken care of and given the world just because they have a vagina.

The new slogan Beyonce (former member of Destiny's Child) likes to advertise is that women now run the world with her hit song "Run the World (Girls)." This song is just as ridiculous as saying that women should cater to their man. Women DO NOT run the world, nor should the message be given to young women and girls that they do. This is a sense of self-entitlement that is outrageous and unfounded. No one should run the world. I am pretty sure the last time I checked, the United States is still a democracy, as is the majority of the world.  

Many women have this sense of entitlement that their man should take care of them and buy them everything their little heart desires, again, just because they have a vagina and their daddy called them princess when they were a child. That is just beyond outrageous.

When you're a young teenager, young woman or even an older woman, you should not expect every Gucci purse, Tiffany&Co. piece of jewelry and Chanel perfume from your significant other.

Healthy and stable relationships are a give and take, 50/50 from both parties involved. Anything less than that makes one person a doormat, and who really wants dirty feet wiped on them?