2008 Woodie Awards
Men should be the head of family, not the dictator
By Bryan Patton
Rocket Staff Writer
Issue date: 3/3/06 Section: Opinion
During class discussion about marriage roles in the family, I expressed that I believe the man should be the leader of the home and the wife should submit to the husband's leadership. This caused an uproar because it gave the impression that I was advocating slavery within the home. This could not be further from the truth.
I expressed an opinion: the idea that a man should not be the "dictator" of the home and neither should the woman be the "slave" to the man. In the marriage context, the man should serve his wife and love her, as she is "one" with him. Likewise, the woman should serve her husband, as he is "one" with her. Unfortunately in our class, it seemed that the word "serve" somehow became the equal of "slave."
Though I may have done a poor job of explaining what service meant, I did, however, come to the conclusion that many individuals (possibly at SRU) have not been exposed to what biblical marriage looks like. I conclude that many don't even know where a Bible-believing Christian stands on the subject of marriage roles. Because SRU is supposed to be an environment of "diverse thinking," it would benefit those who may not know what a Christian worldview teaches.
There are several principles that the scriptures teach in relation to marriage. The first of these biblical principles is given in Ephesians 5:22-24. God says that wives are to submit themselves to their own husbands "as unto the Lord," and they are to be subject to their husbands "in every thing." The verse goes on to say, "for the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church." So does this mean slavery should exist in the home?
The next verse answers the question when it states, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself and died for it" (Eph. 5:25). This verse eliminates the notion that God is an advocate for slavery in the home. In fact, in this verse, the word "love" is translated, "agape" which means a love that does not seek its own-it is not selfish (1 Cor. 13:5). Instead, agape love is directed toward the good of the other person. Therefore, for a husband to love his wife in accordance with God's command in Ephesians 5:25, he must unselfishly dedicate himself to doing what is best for his wife. This is why verse 26 says "a man is actually loving himself when he loves his own wife."
I expressed an opinion: the idea that a man should not be the "dictator" of the home and neither should the woman be the "slave" to the man. In the marriage context, the man should serve his wife and love her, as she is "one" with him. Likewise, the woman should serve her husband, as he is "one" with her. Unfortunately in our class, it seemed that the word "serve" somehow became the equal of "slave."
Though I may have done a poor job of explaining what service meant, I did, however, come to the conclusion that many individuals (possibly at SRU) have not been exposed to what biblical marriage looks like. I conclude that many don't even know where a Bible-believing Christian stands on the subject of marriage roles. Because SRU is supposed to be an environment of "diverse thinking," it would benefit those who may not know what a Christian worldview teaches.
There are several principles that the scriptures teach in relation to marriage. The first of these biblical principles is given in Ephesians 5:22-24. God says that wives are to submit themselves to their own husbands "as unto the Lord," and they are to be subject to their husbands "in every thing." The verse goes on to say, "for the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church." So does this mean slavery should exist in the home?
The next verse answers the question when it states, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself and died for it" (Eph. 5:25). This verse eliminates the notion that God is an advocate for slavery in the home. In fact, in this verse, the word "love" is translated, "agape" which means a love that does not seek its own-it is not selfish (1 Cor. 13:5). Instead, agape love is directed toward the good of the other person. Therefore, for a husband to love his wife in accordance with God's command in Ephesians 5:25, he must unselfishly dedicate himself to doing what is best for his wife. This is why verse 26 says "a man is actually loving himself when he loves his own wife."
